Posts Tagged ‘rip in jeans’

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Black Bean & Garlic Stir Fry w/ Edamame Dip *Day 4*

January 29, 2009

day-4-copy

Total cost about $15

Yo yo, it’s day 4, get your ass on the floor, and…..dry hump…the girl next to you…Sorry, my freestyles these days are a bit exhausted.  Were completely snowed in, power is out in 200,000 houses, we’ve got guests sleeping over, and thank Jesus we still have power.  We decided to make stir-fry tonight, with some mock duck I got for Christmas from my mom.  We laid out a bunch of vegetables, and sauces, noodles, and rice.  Sarah took everyone’s orders like we were in a restaurant.  It was quite endearing.  (quick side note, today’s picture for the vegan amateur porn is the best one I’ve found.  Check out the dudes faces, they look like they all work the prize counter at a 1986 roller rink.)  All together we had :

  • tomatoes
  • chives
  • red onions
  • shitake, portabella, cremini mushroom
  • red and green peppers
  • green & yellow beans
  • broccoli
  • garlic
  • ginger
  • black bean sauce
  • chili garlic sauce
  • soy sauce
  • mock duck & tofu marinated in soy sauce/alegro/ginger/Cayenne pepper/and some water
  • sesame and canola oil

Everything was tossed in a Wok, and cooked together with sesame and canola oil.  I used extra black bean sauce, and boiled the mock duck first to get the canned taste out of it.  The tofu and mock duck was pan seared first.  This stir-fry was so good, I wouldn’t even wear a condom with it.  The entire apartment was filled with an amazing smell, and life tonight was good.

The edamame dip was very much like hummus.  I took the recipe from food networks website. We then dipped carrots in it all night, singing “Kentucky rose” by Michael W. Smith.

Total cost about $5

  • 12 ounces shelled, cooked, and cooled edamame, about 2 cups, recipe follows
  • 1/4 cup diced onion
  • 1/2 cup tightly packed fresh cilantro or parsley leaves
  • 1 large garlic clove, sliced
  • 1/4 cup freshly squeezed lime or lemon juice
  • 1 tablespoon brown miso
  • 1 teaspoon kosher salt
  • 1 teaspoon red chili paste
  • 1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
  • 5 tablespoons olive oil

Place everything in your food processor, and blend until smooth.  Garnish with smoked paprika and cilantro.

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Billy Mays, yells at me.

January 6, 2009

For the past 2 months, while im falling asleep, the show im watching goes away, and im left with a large man, with a lisp, yelling at me. We found some of his “Mighty Mendit” product at a wal-greens while looking for a secret santa gift. I recently ripped a pair of really nice jeans that i just got, so i decided to try mighty mendit on them. I saw in the commercial, a guy ripped his parachute, mighty mendit’ited’ed, and jumped out of an airplane. The shit takes 2 hours to dry, and so far its holding up like a champ. I’m thinking i now know where Billy Mays gets his passion from. Results.