Posts Tagged ‘cookout’


Salty, Buttered, Vegan Scallops.

April 21, 2010

I’m not too big to say there is one or two things I miss from the old days of meat eating.  It’s always seafood.  Lox and scallops.  There are a few veg scallops that seem okay I guess.  There’s this one from Worthington, which I think is the only legit package (owned by Kellogg’s).  There are a few that have done the King Oyster mushroom route.  I made some a few moths ago and they were pretty good.   None of mine looked as good as The Chubby Vegetarians, or the first one I ever saw from Ladyvoxx on The PPK.

I’ve been using a lot of tofu since I recently found theFresh Tofu Inc., tofu.  It’s a totally different tofu.  It’s like westsoy, but better.  I like regular tofu, but when you try stuff like Fresh Tofu Inc., it’s like going from Gin Blossoms to The Beatles.  You can find a way to be snobby and alt in anything, even tofu.  I bought these little cookie cutters a while ago, and used them to cut the tofu into scallop shapes.  Saute them until they have some color in a little vegetable oil.

The butter is important.  Earth Balance gets really clear, and just sort of turns into oil when heated up.  To keep its creaminess, I added some cornstarch.  A few tablespoons or eyeballed, depending on how much butter you are using.  I also add salt, Earth Balance lacks that as well I think.  Whisk it and then add minced garlic after you start to get a creaminess going.  After you plate them and pour the butter on, squeeze a fresh lemon all over the tops.


How can I love you, if you wont lie down?

February 26, 2009

Boy oh boy, having a real job really makes life dull.  Although my job is probably the only one that exists in the nine to five world that I could ever imagine going to bed at midnight for.  Everythings felt very scattered and fast for the past month, and I’m just now starting to feel like myself again.  Well not the old self that could stay up drinking until 5am, and get on the post punk kitchen to post drunk naked pictures of myself, but familiar none the less.  We haven’t really made anything that amazing, but Sarah made these incredible cupcakes.  This was her first successful vegan baking, and it turned a lot of heads at the party.

Here’s our three legged dog tofu,  playing xbox while were cooking.

This is a dinner we made one night that was simple but good.  Fake bacon, lettuce, tomatoes, smoked tofu (not the dog), and veganaise.

This is a lil thing i threw together that involves filo, vegan cream cheese, a basil leaf (next time ill use a spinach leaf), smoked tofu, and sriracha.

and last, we had a bunch of people over the other night and made a ton of vegan sliders.  The recipe for the burger is from Vegan dad.  Everyone ate the shit out of these.

Stay tuned, I’ve got some contests coming up where you guys can win things!  I plan on starting a weekly thing starting in march, where I will be giving away very cool stuff for free!


Smokey Chili *Day 3*

January 28, 2009


It’s day three, and being really broke never tasted so good.  It’s snowing outside, 18 degrees, and my girlfriend had “roomie” night tonight.  Which basically means I have to go away for a few hours to hang out with my male friends, and let them get wasted on wine.  Tonight was chili night, so it worked out well for everyone.  I’ve made 26 chili’s in the past year, and they’ve all just been O.K.  Nothing really grabbed me.  In fact I came in last place at a chili cook off for a friend of mine’s birthday.  This chili, is in fact, the one.  My dad always had a delicious chili growing up, and I’m now proud to say I have my own chili.  All of my previous recipes have come from recipes, so I decided to go rogue with this one, and just do my thing.  It’s a little smokey, delicious, and of course cheap.

Total cost about $11

  • 2 can black or pinto beans, drained
  • 2 can kidney beans, drained
  • 2 can diced tomatoes
  • 1 onion, diced
  • 6 cloves garlic, minced
  • 2 green peppers
  • 1 small can of tomato paste
  • 4 tbls of nutritional yeast
  • 4 tbsp olive oil
  • 1 cup tbsp vegetable broth
  • 1/2 cup of hickory allegro (my favorite marinade, basically soy and liquid smoke + some other shit)
  • 4 tbsp chili powder
  • 2 tbls oregano
  • 4 tbls curry
  • 1 tbls turmeric
  • 4 tbls curry
  • 2 tbls smoked paprika
  • 1 tbls salt
  • 2 tbls ancho chili powder
  • 2 tbls mexican chili powder
  • 1 tbls red pepper flakes (optional)
  • 2 cups of hydrated  TVP
  • 2 cups of water
  • 1 glass with 2 dudes wrestling on it

Cook the onions, green peppers and garlic first in the olive oil until transparent.  Slowly add the beans.  Let it simmer for a few minutes, and add all of the spices.  Go ahead and pull out your glass with two dudes wrestling on it, and serve hot.


Louisville Vegan Reubens & Sublime

January 21, 2009

Reubens have always been something that you either love or hate. For example. The people that live in the building underneath my girlfriends house can eat all of the dicks. I was reading an article on that my friend Matt pointed out to me, and it made a lot of sense. There are certain people that can eat a ton of dicks. I agree that there are in fact people that you come across in your life, that can eat All of the dicks. For one second let me tell you about these people. They’re about 22 or so, and I totally get it. I’m 26, and 22 was not long ago. Parties are fun, and i still get down very hard. I like beer. I like loud music. There is a big difference between drinking some beer, and listening to some music, and drinking some beer at 22, and listening to some music at 22. First the beer is just drank to get to get as annoying as possible. The music they’re listening to is, as annoying as possible. It’s not like they’re listening to listenable music. They’re listening to sounds that are just bass. Tons of bass, with nothing else. It’s probably a friend of theirs that makes music on cakewalk and closes their eyes, nodding their heads. These people can eat All of the dicks.  I want to record the sounds coming from the ground below, its really incredible. Like right now they’re playing sublime. As if I didn’t hate sublime enough, these fucking shit heads downstairs have to be listening to this shit. So while I’m upstairs trying to do my thing, they’re down there screaming and singing along to the most overplayed band EVER. Don’t tell me you like sublime, cause I know, and I don’t fucking care.

The kids downstairs are playing bad fish, and I’m crying like a 4 year old in the corner of the room.

Anyways, back to reubens. I made these reubans, and they turned out pretty good. I took the recipe from

I also added some instand tapioca, like i talked about in the message boards, and i couldnt tell any difference at all. The seitan turned out pretty good, but make sure you pan sear it in some soy sauce, the guy in the video clearly made a different recipe. It doesn’t turn out the way the asshole in the stupid hat shows it. None the less it’s pretty good. I used FYH mozzarella cheese, and vegan thousand island.


Red potato & Yukon Gold Hash Browns w/Spicy Roasted Garlic Ketchup

January 20, 2009

– Red & Yukon Gold Hash Browns w/Spicy Roasted Garlic Ketchup

– English Muffins w/Cumin Dill Sour Cream, Diced Olives and Sweet Peppers

– Pan Seared baby bananas w/Roasted Red Peppers & chives

Hash browns were invented by the ancient rednecks of Georgia in 1773.  They were at one point used during sex games, where the redneck would  place a batch of shredded potatoes on his womans stomach, believing that “her body was so smokin’ hot”, he could actually cook them on her.  Of course, this is just a legend.  Usually nothing would happen, and the two would just end up having sex in a pile of shredded potatoes, and onions.  However, stories like these that my parents told me growing up, always claimed a big piece of my heart.

I threw this together while in the grocery store.  The hash browns are just shredded red and yukon gold potatoes, as well as some cut onions.  Browned them on a skillet with some oil, salt and pepper and of course, smoked paprika.   Make sure and lay a few paper towels over the potatoes after you shred them, and get as much of the water out of them as you can.  The ketchup is put in a blender with sriracha, roasted garlic, some lime juice and s&p.

The English muffins were toasted and had some earth balance and roasted garlic (literally spread on there!).  The sauce was made with tofutti sour cream, cumin, dill, salt and peper, and a dash of sriracha sauce.  Mix it well and  lay it over the English muffin.  Green, kalamata olives and sweet red peppers were diced, and laid on top.

The baby bananas were pan seared in earth balance with salt and pepper.  Laid over them is roasted red peppers and sliced chives.

Dig in!  Like most meals that people suggest wines with, I suggest this to go with a warm     Heileman’s Old Style.


Curry Sweet Potato Fries w/ Spicy Mango Chutney Ranch

January 19, 2009

I’ve never made sweet potato fries, and I love curry. I had been reading that the sweet potato fries turned out mushy, so I decided to go with the baking at 450 degree method. I boiled the potatoes first, then cut them into fries. Toss them in curry and cornstarch, salt, sprinkle some smoked paprika, and throw them in the oven. Make sure to lay foil on the pan, and spray it good with some pam, or they will stick bad. I baked them for a while, and turned them about every 10 minutes. While they were baking, I put some earth balance in a pan, melted it down, and added some curry and lime juice. Let that cook on high for minute, then turn it off until the fries are done. For the sauce, I just mixed some vegan ranch with some mango chutney, lime juice and s&p. The fries turned out pretty crispy. I dipped one in the chutney ranch, smacked my girlfriends ass really hard while chewing, and said, oh shiiiit. The ranch really makes this one.


Seitan greasy highway burger….

January 16, 2009

For some reason no matter what, everytime I post something up that looks a lot like meat, I get a ton of emails and comments. They usualy go a little something like this. “Man, i couldnt eat that, that looks too real.” There seems to be a lot of people that are vegan, that really get what we call “annoying”. I get it, you’re so vegan, that not only did you make a personal decision to not eat meat, but you’ve also made a personal decision to be annoying. You know how I know that you made that personal decision? Because you have to tell me, and the world, that its too real for you to eat. Nobody goes on blogs and says things like, “sorry that corn on the cob looks way to much like a penis for me to eat.” You know why? Because really, who gives a shit. I’m actually not a huge fan of fake meats, being that I really actually crave vegetables most of the time, but from time to time, I think it’s great. Now if you don’t like the way they taste, thats one thing, but if you just wan’t to tell me how you can’t get past the fact that it looks like meat, (in sarah palin voice) theeeanks, but no theeanks. I used the PPK recipe for the seitan. But I changed up some very important steps. First I didn’t make the vital wheat gluten, i just went and bought it in a bag. Second, I didn’t boil it, i baked it in the broth. That’s a huge difference in texture change. The texture really amazing. Let it cook for an hour or so, at about 300 degrees. When you take it out, cut it into the size you want. Throw it in to a pan, and toss about 3 tbls of olive oil, and add some salt and pepper. The oil will give it a very greasy effect. Of course this isn’t the healthiest sandwich, but its really delicious. I put some vegan mayonnaise on the buns, lettuce, pickles, onions, ketchup, mustard, and some s&p. Put whatever other disgusting things on it you like, I just cover the good stuff.